<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>The Simple Act of Breathing by Baymax_13</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25889467">The Simple Act of Breathing</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baymax_13/pseuds/Baymax_13'>Baymax_13</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Assassination Attempt(s), Hurt Zuko (Avatar), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Medical Inaccuracies, Poison, Protective Sokka (Avatar), Seizures, Sick Zuko (Avatar), Unreliable Narrator, Vomiting, Whump, hemlock poisoning, zuko's fine though</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:54:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,402</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25889467</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baymax_13/pseuds/Baymax_13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sokka thinks he screams as the firebender falls over, but he is sure he does when his partner’s body starts convulsing. He has never known terror like that before, not even as he was holding Toph’s hand, certain they would both fall to their deaths in a war they were too young to fight. </p><p>He didn’t know terror like that was even possible, survivable. It stops his heart. He actually feels it skip a beat as he runs over to Zuko, desperately grabbing onto any part of him that he can reach. </p><p>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p>Or the assassination attempt that Sokka can't protect Zuko from.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1004</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Simple Act of Breathing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Me writing this: They are HUSBANDS</p><p>Basically I was just like, we know Sokka hates not being able to protect the people he loves so what if someone tried to hurt Zuko in a way he couldn't defend against. </p><p>The symptoms Zuko goes through are symptoms of hemlock poisoning, which there actually isn't a cure for and can be really lethal. It basically paralyzes your muscles until you die of respiratory failure, which is terrifying. </p><p>Also fun fact! The u-shaped dishes people throw up in at the hospital are called emesis basins, but I figured Sokka wouldn't know that, so I had him just call them u-shaped dishes.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It happens when Zuko and Sokka are having dinner together for the first time in a week. Zuko’s work has always kept him from his husband, but recently it has been hard for the two to get even a moment of peace together. </p><p>Sokka now thinks it was intentional, running him down so he wouldn’t be able to fight it off, then waiting for the only time Zuko lets his guard down to strike. </p><p>The worst part is that it’s not a battle Sokka can fight. One minute, Zuko is fine, lively even, and the next he’s slumped over the table, eyes glassy and breath sporadic. There is no attacker, no swordsman or even a master bender. </p><p>Sokka thinks he screams as the firebender falls over, but he is sure he does when his partner’s body starts convulsing. He has never known terror like that before, not even as he was holding Toph’s hand, certain they would both fall to their deaths in a war they were too young to fight. </p><p>He didn’t know terror like that was even possible, survivable. It stops his heart. He actually feels it skip a beat as he runs over to Zuko, desperately grabbing onto any part of him that he can reach. </p><p>He doesn’t know what to do, can’t think of what to do when his mind is a mess of panic and <em>Zuko, Zuko, Zuko</em>. </p><p>His hands tremble and it’s a sickening parallel to the way Zuko’s hands are flailing around him. He can’t breathe through the fear of watching the firebender collapse like a puppet with its strings cut. </p><p>Sokka is frozen, holding the firebender to him, doing his best to stop the convulsions, doing his best to stop Zuko from hurting himself. </p><p>Two Kyoshi warriors appear at his side and he hopes one of them is Suki, but he doesn’t look up to check. He only has eyes for the man in his arms, who is paler than Sokka has ever seen him. </p><p>One of the Kyoshi warriors tries to take Zuko from him and Sokka snarls like a sabertooth moose lion. The other kyoshi warrior grabs him then, pinning his hands behind him while Sokka rages against the hold. She murmurs into his ear, “It’s me Sokka, It’s Suki, we’re here to help.” </p><p>It does nothing to quell the feeling of fire in his veins or the sheer desperation that encompasses him, but he stops his thrashing and falls, limp into her hold. </p><p>He sobs gutturally, the sound wretched and unnatural in the way only grief can be as he watches the other woman manhandle his <em>everything</em> onto his side. It feels as though Zuko has been seizing for ages, and yet it continues for longer than Sokka can bear. </p><p>He feels like a coward as he turns into Suki’s chest, hiding from the horrors before him. </p><p>There is no relief when Zuko stills. He looks unnatural, lips blue and skin pallid. Immediately, the Kyoshi warrior swings him over her shoulder and all but runs out of the dining room towards what Sokka can only assume is the infirmary. He makes as though to follow her but falls onto his knees instead, head swimming. </p><p>Suki takes his hand and squeezes, offering her silent comfort, and when he deems himself ready they both stand and head towards where his husband is. </p><p>The royal physician is already there, tending to the firelord. Zuko hasn’t regained any color, but his breathing seems stronger than before. Sokka sits at the chair on his husband’s left, guarding what he knows is his biggest insecurity, and grabs onto his hand. The physician seems annoyed by his presence but one glare from Suki shuts him up before he can say anything about it. </p><p>Zuko’s hand is cold in a way a firebender’s hands rarely are. Sokka knows it means his inner flame is weakened, but he doesn’t - <em>can’t</em> - dwell on it. He just brings the hand up to his lips and tries his best to warm it. </p><p>He can’t do much, but he can do this. </p><p>The infirmary is a bustle of noise as the healers weave around each other like a well-oiled machine. They’re the best - Zuko had made sure of it. Even so they keep shooting pitying glances at the pair and Sokka begins to feel disdain for their presence. He wants to be alone with Zuko, but he’ll put up with the stares if they can save him. </p><p>A nurse approaches, fidgeting nervously behind him, and Sokka buries the urge to snap at her. </p><p>“Lord Sokka, may I speak with you?” she asks. </p><p>He feels like crying, suddenly. He doesn’t want her to tell him that his worst fears have been realized. He doesn’t want to know if he’s about to lose his husband. But, he supposes there is no avoiding it, and he would like to know if this is the last bit of time they’ll have together. He wouldn’t want to waste it. </p><p>He presses a light kiss to the palm of Zuko’s hand, then lays it gently beside him and stands. </p><p>He faces her. </p><p>His voice is steadier than he would’ve dared hope when he replies. “Yes, what is it?”</p><p>“We believe-” She pauses. “We believe that his majesty has been poisoned.”</p><p>Sokka supposes he must have known that was the case, but the word poison still sends a shockwave through his system. He takes a step back, as if to protect Zuko, but the damage has been done. He can’t protect him from this. </p><p>“Will he…” He can’t finish the question. His hands shake with barely repressed fear. </p><p>The healer makes a move as if to comfort him, but thinks better of it at the last second. “He seems to have ingested a low dosage, so there’s a good chance that if he makes it through the night he’ll be alright. But there’s no antidote to this poison, so at the moment all we can do is treat his symptoms. The rest is up to him, I’m afraid.”</p><p>He nods, closing his eyes and turning his head to the side. It’s a dismissal, and the healer complies with the silent request. He can’t break down. He has to be there for Zuko. </p><p>Sokka takes a few seconds to compose himself, to make sure the tears that have been pooling behind his eyes don’t leak down his cheeks. Breathing is difficult, and he almost laughs at the irony of the feeling when his husband has barely been breathing since he collapsed. </p><p>He feels unhinged, waiting to fall apart. </p><p>But he doesn’t. He takes a deep breath, and settles in next to his husband again. When he closes his eyes he can almost pretend he is holding Zuko’s hand like he always does. When they walk together, sit together, go to bed together, Sokka holds Zuko’s hand. </p><p>He hopes this won’t be the last time he gets to do so. </p><p>The hours blur together as Sokka sits patiently by Zuko’s bedside. The healers force tea down his throat to help with the inflammation around his lungs and spread a paste on his chest to soothe the muscles. They tell him that it’s good that his husband’s asleep, that if he was awake he would likely be in pain. </p><p>Sokka feels decidedly selfish for still wishing Zuko would wake. If his husband does… If this is the last time they’ll be together in this realm then he wishes he could see the golden eyes he has grown to love so deeply one last time. He wants to tell Zuko how much he loves him, wants Zuko to say it back, wants them to have a proper goodbye if that’s what this is. </p><p>Zuko doesn’t wake, but he does begin convulsing again. Sokka is so shocked that for a second all he can do is stare, and then he’s being pushed away as the healers run around Zuko’s prone figure. The seizing ends quicker this time than last time, but when it does instead of Sokka being able to return to his vigil the head physician jumps onto the bed and begins chest compressions. </p><p>It takes a second for Sokka to process what this means but when he does he collapses onto the floor, shaking. Tears pool in his eyes and he closes them harshly. He covers his ears too, not wanting to hear the moment the love of his life is declared dead. </p><p>He doesn’t move until a hand pries his own away from his ears, hoisting him up off the floor. It’s the healer from earlier, and she settles him again in the chair he’s claimed as his own, He’s staring down, doesn’t want to look, but eventually he hears it. The strained but there breaths coming from the cot. </p><p>The relief is palpable. Feeling returns to his limbs and his face flushes at the sentiment. His husband is <em>alive</em>. </p><p><em>For now</em>, a nasty little voice inside his head says, but the relief still takes precedence. </p><p>Sokka doesn’t sleep the whole night, doesn’t move from his post. He is a statue guarding the firelord, never wavering in his duty. </p><p>He feels like a fraud, knows he let the real threat slip through his defenses, but he won’t fail again. </p><p>When the moon is highest, he sends a silent prayer up to Yue. <em>I know that firebenders draw strength from the sun, but if there’s any way you could help him through the night, please, please do</em>. </p><p>He thinks Zuko breathes a little easier after that. </p><p>Sometimes, Zuko will groan a little, or even whimper, and Sokka will soothe him gently. He can’t help the hope that pulls at him that this time, he will wake up. </p><p>He doesn’t though, not throughout the night, but his heart also keeps beating - either too slow or too fast but <em>beating</em> - and Sokka counts it as a victory. </p><p>It’s not until sunrise that Zuko even begins to stir, and it takes hours after that until he opens his eyes. </p><p>Sokka is ecstatic when it happens, shouting for the physician with barely contained glee, but when Zuko barely reacts to his outburst, the feeling dampens.</p><p>His husband's eyes, usually so expressive, are blank. There isn’t even a flicker of recognition when Sokka cups his face and whispers, “my love?”</p><p>The doctor says it’s normal, to be expected even, and that he should regain awareness as the day goes by. He says it’s excellent that he’s even awake this soon. </p><p>Sokka squashes the hope he felt down, thinking that maybe if he does it won’t hurt as much when the next curveball is thrown his way. </p><p>Hope is like a weed though, festering through the cracks in the pavement. It springs up, uninvited and unannounced, and so Sokka cannot quite get rid of it as he gazes lovingly at his husband. </p><p>It’s almost noon when Zuko jerks, yanking his hand away from Sokka’s hold as if it’s been burned. He gazes wildly around the room, trying to scramble up towards the headboard but much too weak to do so. </p><p>Sokka is startled, but they’ve done this enough whenever Zuko has nightmares that he knows what to do. </p><p>He reaches a hand gently towards Zuko, cupping the right side of his face and stroking his cheekbone with his thumb. “My love, it’s alright, it’s just me.” He smiles as comfortingly as he can. “You’re safe.”</p><p>Zuko stares at him for an eternity before he blinks. “S- Sokka?”</p><p>The fearful tone and the raspier than usual way he says it breaks Sokka’s heart, but he doesn’t let it show, just gently sitting on the bed next to his husband’s cowering form. “Yes my love, it’s just me and you,” he says. </p><p>Zuko’s body relaxes and he all but collapses into Sokka’s open arms. He’s trembling, shaking like a leaf in the wind, but he’s conscious and alert and Sokka can’t stop the smile that takes over his face at having his husband back in his arms like this. </p><p>It’s only then that he notices that the healers have all stepped out of the room to give them space, and he finds that his disdain lessens. </p><p>The happy reunion is short-lived as Zuko pulls back, eyes wild. “I’m gonna be sick,” he says. </p><p>Sokka’s eyes widen and he runs around until he finds one of the u-shaped bowls he’s pretty sure are for this specifically. He makes it just in time. Sokka holds Zuko’s hair away from his face and notes that it’s mainly bile coming up. He supposed Zuko only had a few bites of dinner last night - a fact which probably saved his life. </p><p>The thought sends the now familiar wave of fear through him. <em>What if he had eaten more?</em> </p><p>He relaxes though as Zuko stops vomiting and leans limply against Sokka’s chest. Sokka takes the basin and puts it on the chair where he spent the night, then gathering his husband more securely into his arms and pushing them both against the headboard. </p><p>He’s pressing a kiss to the top of Zuko’s hair when the head physician steps back in. </p><p>His face is questioning and Sokka nods to indicate he can check on the man in his arms. Sokka has always been protective of the people he loves, that hasn’t changed since the war, but after this he might not let Zuko out of his sight ever again. </p><p>The man checks Zuko’s temperature and reflexes, and then asks him some questions to test his cognitive responsiveness. Zuko is slow to answer, but he gets all the questions right and the physician doesn’t seem concerned about it so Sokka relaxes. </p><p>By the end of the exam Zuko’s eyes are drifting closed, and before Sokka can even think to freak out, the physician tells him it’s natural sleep. “He needs rest to recover, but his prognosis is excellent with the progress he’s made so far,” he says. </p><p>Sokka feels his own eyes start to close, and now that he’s sure his husband will be ok he allows it to happen. </p><p>He supposed the physician must have left at some point, but all his attention is on the feeling of Zuko’s chest rising and falling steadily in his hold. He has never been more grateful for the simple act of breathing. </p><p><em>Thank you, Yue</em>, he thinks, and is asleep within minutes.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you enjoyed it, kudos and comments make my day :)</p><p>Also, if any of you have any prompt suggestions, I’d love to hear them and probably write them too!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>